How to be a good fighter of Life

If you want to succeed in life, you have to be a good fighter. Why? Because you need to fight to get valuable things in life. While you could achieve things without much effort, there is always a price for the precious ones. They not only come to you out of the air.

   The question is: how can we be a good fighter in life? Five things you should do.

   First, you should know what you want. If you do not even know what your goals are, there is no way you can be a good fighter. Without knowing what you want, you can end up getting things wrong. Without knowing what you want, you can also lack the motivation you need to succeed. Just think of a corridor. No matter how good it is a corridor, he is a big problem if he does not know where is the finish line.

   Second, you need to expect failures and prepare for them. This is important because otherwise you may get discouraged when you encounter difficulties along the path. Waiting for failure, you will be able to keep your motivation high when you face challenges. In preparation for the failures, you will be able to quickly get around it and even use them as trampolines.

   Third, you must train intensely alone. Just look at the athletes who are preparing for Olympics. They can expect to get gold without intensive training? I do not think so. Even talented athletes require intensive training for best results. Similarly, you need to intensive training in any field you are working. Discipline has to improve itself.

   Fourthly, you must always do your best on each occasion. Aim to beat your last performance and break your own records. Doing this will push you to move and never rest.

   Fifth, surround yourself with the right people. The trip will be much easier if you have the right people around you. Find people who can encourage you when you're down and remind you when you're wrong. Find people who can complement their skills and knowledge. Together with the right people, you will be able to achieve much more than what you can never achieve it. Applying these five points is not easy, but they will help you be a good fighter and achieve success in life.

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DRINK WATER @ MORNING ON EMPTY STOMACH

It is popular in Japan today to drink water immediately after waking up every morning. Furthermore, scientific tests have proven its value. We publish below a description of use of water for our readers. For old and serious diseases as well as modern illnesses the water treatment had been found successful by a Japanese medical society as a 100% cure for the following diseases:
Headache, body ache, heart system, arthritis, fast heart beat, epilepsy, excess fatness, bronchitis asthma, TB, meningitis, kidney and urine diseases, vomiting, gastritis, diarrhea, piles, diabetes, constipation, all eye diseases, womb, cancer and menstrual disorders, ear nose and throat diseases.

METHOD OF TREATMENT
1. As you wake up in the morning before brushing teeth, drink 4 x 160ml glasses of water
2. Brush and clean the mouth but do not eat or drink anything for 45 minute
3.. After 45 minutes you may eat and drink as normal.
4. After 15 minutes of breakfast, lunch and dinner do not eat or drink anything for 2 hours
5. Those who are old or sick and are unable to drink 4 glasses of water at the beginning may commence by taking little water and gradually increase it to 4 glasses per day.
6. The above method of treatment will cure diseases of the sick and others can enjoy a healthy life.
The following list gives the number of days of treatment required to cure/control/reduce main diseases:
1. High Blood Pressure (30 days)
2. Gastric (10 days)
3. Diabetes (30 days)
4. Constipation (10 days)
5. Cancer (180 days)
6. TB (90 days)
7. Arthritis patients should follow the above treatment only for 3 days in the 1st week, and from 2nd week onwards – daily..
This treatment method has no side effects, however at the commencement of treatment you may have to urinate a few times.
It is better if we continue this and make this procedure as a routine work in our life. Drink Water and Stay healthy and Active.
This makes sense .. The Chinese and Japanese drink hot tea with their meals ..not cold water. Maybe it is time we adopt their drinking habit while eating!!! Nothing to lose, everything to gain...

For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you.
It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion.
Once this 'sludge' reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine.
Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal.

A serious note about heart attacks:
· Women should know that not every heart attack symptom is going to be the left arm hurting,
· Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line.
· You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack.
· Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms.
· 60% of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up.
· Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep. Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know, the better chance we could survive...
A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to everyone they know, you can be sure that we'll save at least one life.

Water can save your life.

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कर्म का सिद्धांत

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How To Be Happy

At the end of the day, what most people really want in life is to be happy.

Many people believe that happiness comes from obtaining certain objects. They say things like,

"I’ll be so happy when I get my new iPod!"

However, the happiness associated with obtaining these objects is usually fleeting. Have you ever received something you really wanted only to have it end up sitting on a shelf gathering dust a few weeks later? I know I have!

So, if lasting happiness can’t be found by obtaining ‘things’, how can we increase the levels of happiness in our lives?

I believe that the best way to obtain lasting happiness is to bring happiness into the lives of others. The most amazing thing about happiness is that the more you give away to others, the more you receive for yourself.

Here is a step-by-step plan that will help you bring happiness into the lives of others and thereby increase your own levels of happiness.

Step 1: Select someone in your life that you care about. It could be your partner, a child, a friend, a nephew or niece etc.

Step 2: Identify that person’s current passion in life. To do this, just ask them what they’re up to or interested in at the moment.

Step 3: Organise an experience that combines spending time with that person and persuing their passion.

Here’s a real life example to show you exactly how this works:

When my Cousin Kanha was 8 years old, his main passion in life was drawing. One day I arranged to pick him up to go on an ‘painting day’. Our first stop was a stationary store where we puchased a sheets and colours.

We then draw everything he knew. What made this experience so special was that we were spending time together pursuing his main passion in life.

Kanha was unbelievably excited. His happiness in turn made me incredibly happy. This trip is one of my fondest memories . The total cost of our expedition was just 100 Rupees.

So, whenever you’re feeling a little low and need a dose of happiness, one of the best things you can do is to focus on making someone else happy. Remember…

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How To Handle Feedback

An important skill for achieving success in life is learning how to respond to feedback from the people around you. When you master this skill you’ll have the power to improve almost every aspect of your life.

There are three different types of feedback:

(1) Positive feedback 

(2) Constructive negative feedback 

(3) Destructive negative feedback

How To Handle Positive Feedback

Positive feedback is a gift and it should be acknowledged and appreciated like any other gift. Surprisingly, many people dismiss positive feedback with off hand comments. Do any of these examples sound familiar to you?

Feedback: "You look beautiful tonight"
Response: "No I don’t, I just look the same as always"

Feedback: "You did a great job on that report"
Response: "Oh, it was nothing"

Feedback: "I love your necklace!"
Response: "It’s not real, its a fake"

Making dismissive comments like this in response to positive feedback is the equivalent of being handed a gift and tossing it over your shoulder without even opening it.

A much better way to respond to positive feedback is to simply make eye contact, smile, and say, "Thank-you". By doing this you will acknowledge and enjoy the gift of positive feedback.

How To Handle Constructive Negative Feedback

Believe it or not, this is the most beneficial type of feedback of all. While positive feedback can help you feel better, constructive negative feedback can help you get better.

Many people get defensive when someone gives them constructive negative feedback. They say things like, "What would she know!" or alternatively, they try and justify themselves and prove the other person wrong.

A much better way to respond to constructive negative feedback is to thank the person for taking the time to provide you with feedback and then ask yourself:

How can I use this feedback to improve?

For example if you own a business and a customer complains about something, instead of trying to prove the customer wrong, thank them for the feedback and take the opportunity to improve your business so that the complaint does not impact another customer in the future.

When you use negative feedback in this way, it becomes a powerful tool for improving your business, your work environment and your relationships.

How To Handle Desctructive Negative Feedback

Destructive negative feedback is negative energy that is meant to cause pain rather than help you to improve. The important thing to understand about destructive feedback is that it is often a way for someone to lash out at the world around them.

In many cases it has very little to do with you and everything to do with the way that person is feeling about themselves and their own problems.

The best way to deal with destructive negative feedback is to recognise it for what it is and just let it go without taking it to heart.

Unfortunately many people have their ‘feedback model’ back-to-front. They dismiss positive feedback, fight constructive negative feedback and dwell on destructive negative feedback.

If instead, you can learn to accept and enjoy positive feedback, use constructive negative feedback to constantly improve and avoid destructive negative feedback, you will greatly accelerate your progress to success.

This Week’s Action Steps

1. Learn to recognise and distinguish between the three types of feedback.

2. When you receive positive feedback, accept and enjoy it as a gift. Simply make eye contact, smile and say thank-you.

3. When you receive constructive negative feedback say, "Thanks for the feedback" and use it to improve.

4. When you receive destructive negative feedback, recognise that it is the act of someone lashing out and don’t take it to heart.

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How To Get What You Want

Asking people for what we want can sometimes be a difficult process involving awkward discussions and potential conflict. However, it doesn’t have to be that way.

The secret to getting what you want from other people is to develop a genuine sense of reciprocity by giving before you receive.

The term ‘reciprocity’ describes the expectation that people will respond to you in the same way that you respond to them. So if you give another person something of value, they will be much more inclined to give you something in return.

Next time you want something from someone, instead of simply asking or demanding what you want, try using the following Reciprocity Formula.

The Reciprocity Formula

Step 1: Analyse the situation from the other person’s point of view and try to identify what they currently want. If you can’t figure out what they want, the best thing to do is to ask them.

Step 2: When you have identified the main thing they want, present your case by saying something like, "If I help you achieve… [what they want], could we discuss… [what you want]. Most reasonable people will be open to this approach because they are receiving before they have to give.

Step 3: Follow through and help the other person achieve their objective. The more time and effort you put in during this step, the more reciprocity you will develop.

Step 4: When you have achieved the objective you agreed upon, revisit your initial discussion and ask for what you originally wanted.

Here’s an example that shows how the Reciprocity Formula works in the real world:

Sherry worked as a Sales Rep in a software company and wanted to ask her boss for a raise. From previous experience, she knew that simply asking for a raise was rarely effective so she decided to apply the Reciprocity Formula.

Step 1: Sherry had lunch with her boss and asked him what his major goal was for the quarter. He informed her that what he really wanted was to sell 1000 copies of the companies new accounting software before the end of the financial year.

Step 2: Sherry then presented her case by saying, "If I can sell 1000 copies of the new accounting software by June 30th, would you be open to discussing a raise?" Her boss said he’d be happy to.

Step 3: Sherry got down to work and devised a viral marketing campaign on the Internet. She worked extremely hard and her boss could see that she was serious about achieving her goal.

Step 4: Sherry achieved her sales goal and arranged to have lunch with her boss again. In a three month time frame, she’d added a great deal of value to the company and in doing so, she’d also built up a genuine sense of reciprocity with her boss. Over lunch, Sherry’s boss confirmed that he would be happy to give her a raise.

Giving before you receive and developing a genuine sense of reciprocity is one of the most effective ways to get what you want from other people. So today, I’d like to encourage you to use the Reciprocity Formula to develop true WIN-WIN agreements that will help you achieve your most important life goals.

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How To Deal With Negativity

One of the most common questions I get asked is how to deal with a spouse, relative or close friend who has a tendency to be negative. Clearly in this situation you can’t simply walk away and spend all your time with positive people.

Imagine for a moment that your spouse, relative or friend is like a glass that is filled with a dark liquid which represents their negativity.

A lot of people try to rectify this situation by saying things like, "I really wish you’d stop being so negative all the time!"
The problem with this approach is that criticism is a form of negative energy and you are therefore adding more negativity to the situation which usually makes things worse not better.

So what’s the answer?
The answer is to pour positive energy into their glass instead!

As you continue to pour positive energy into their glass their negativity will slowly be diluted. Here are five ways to do this in the real world:
(1) Share fun and enjoyable experiences together. It is hard for people to be negative when they are having fun.
(2) Don’t dwell on negative conversations. When your spouse, relative or friend starts being negative, redirect the conversation to a less contentious topic. An effective way to do this is by asking a qustion about a new topic.
(3) Be a positive example. Continue to enjoy your life even if you initially have to do it alone. As you enjoy yourself, continually invite your spouse, relative or friend to join in the fun.
(4) Coordinate an Escape. Often negativity comes from staying in a negative environment for too long. A great way to help your spouse, relative or friend is to assist them to escape that environment on a regular basis. This can be as simple as getting out of the house and going for a walk. A complete change of scene can often act as a pressure valve and help you reconnect.
(5) Identify and Replace negative routines. Review how you spend time with your spouse, relative or friend and identify negative routines such as complaining about your job every week at Friday night drinks. Once you’ve identified a negative routine, replace it with something different to break the pattern of negativity.
At the end of the day, we all have a tendency to be negative at times and what we need at those times is someone to help lift us up rather than criticise us for being negative. Therefore the most effective way to deal with negativity is to dilute it with positive experiences and positive energy.

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Important Values in Life

Life comes with its ups and downs. Yes, we all know that. But there are certain mindsets that affect our life for the better and some that affect it for the worst. These mindsets that affect our life for the better can be called values. Whilst it stands true that all people have different values in life, there are some important values in life, that in my opinion, should be considered by all. Not because these are the values that I follow, but because it could truly make this world a better place. Here is my list of important values to have in life.

Love: The first of the most important values in life is love. It is an important personal value to open your mind to the concept of love. I don't mean this in a fairy tale kind of way. That is not the only kind of love. The way in which you love your family, and friends, you can love everybody. Love is the bringer of compassion. Once, we are led by compassion, we see the best in others, while they see the best in us. We can have more faith in the world. This will help us to refrain from being suspicious, keeping us more at ease.

Understanding: This is the second important value in life. I see a lot of people around me holding grudges and keeping tempers. They know at the back of their mind and in the depths of their heart that the other person had a reason for doing what they did. Yet, they let their anger take over. Understanding is the key to a happy mind and a caring heart. If you are ready to understand and accept people and circumstances for what they are, you can gain control over it. Understand that people are doing their best, and instead of questioning it, try to find out ways to help them out.

Respect: The third of the important values in life is respect. It is very important to have respect for people. This not only allows you to get inspired by their positive aspects, but also allows you to notice their negatives. Nobody is perfect, neither you, nor me. Respect is the only way we can adopt the best of all that is around us, in the process, making us a better person everyday, every moment. A very important fact about respect is that the more you give, the more you earn. It is in fact one of the most important values in society.

Discipline: The fourth of the important values in life is discipline. Sadly, many people confuse discipline for routine and avoid it. Well, routine is the act of doing the same thing over and over again, due to lack of opportunity or imagination. On the other hand (and far better), discipline accepts the absence of routine, on the condition of responsibility. A disciplined person will have a lot of fun, but will make sure that he completes his duties. He will go out and have a blast, but will ensure that he is back at the decided time. A disciplined and responsible person will respect his as well as other's time. As such, he will always be punctual.

Honesty: The fifth important value in life is honesty. You must be wondering why this value in mentioned at the end. Well, that is because it is the base on which the other values stand. It is the most important value to have. Honesty does not only mean telling your parents when you goofed up. Or admitting to your partner that you made a big mistake. Honesty is admitting to yourself that you are not perfect. It means avoiding to make a mistake. An honest person will try his best to not goof up, but if he does, he will not only admit it, but will willingly accept the consequences. All the other values that are mentioned need to be accepted and followed with honesty. That is the only way in which they will affect your life for the better.

Important values in life differ for different people. Nonetheless, no matter which culture you belong to, certain values help make your life a whole lot better. These are the values that I have known and followed throughout my life.

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Success - Its not that easy

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MORAL : Life is all about just being happy nyhow!!

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Real-life angels in a selfish world - Be a Sharefish not Selfish

When you meet people who think more of others rather than themselves, it’s such a refreshing change and gives hope to humanity that we aren’t all the same.

WE live in such a selfish world where everything seems to revolve around “me, me, me”. Nothing is ever enough, “I want more money, a bigger house, a better life” so, when you meet people who think more of others rather than themselves and are more interested in giving rather than taking, it’s such a refreshing change.
It gives hope to humanity that we aren’t all the same.
In truth, people who “do good” are all around us from the stranger you pass on the street to the unassuming girl at work you never knew was trying to save tigers.

So let’s start thinking about anyone other than ourselves for a moment. What skills do we have that we can share with others whether it’s animals, the elderly, or children who are waiting for you to put a smile on their face?

If you also want to be a Sharefish rather Selfish then please visit http://www.sharefish.org/
May be you can be able to bring smile to someon`s face.

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Your Words have Power. Use them Wisely.

I thought I'd share this photo, since it's extremely powerful and would like to see this passed on to others. Words do hurt. So Please use them wisely. Use it to motivate others. Say lovely words to spread peace.

 People are going into depression these days. They have money, family and all the materialistic things to fulfill their needs and desire but they want is love which is lacking from their lives in today`s selfish world.

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Awww.. m growing old...!!

Birthday is the day on which you realize that all of a sudden you expect something.. you want something.. and you dreamt of hell lot of things from your life. On the same time you got to know that so less time left to accomplish goals set years ago.

Its true that life is like a river and we have to float as per the flow but if this journey with myself of life has no direction then there will be no destination and we will be like "Distance travelled unlimited but final Displacement Zero" as we will reach nowhere.

So from my wish list i picked up small little cute gift and presented myself a new look on my birthday.
Got my hair smoothing done finally. (Rebonded)

Cheers
Happy Birthday to me ;-)

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India First

I would like to inform you that now I am financial Advisor in India First Life Insurance. Let me give you some brief overview of the company of which I am part of.

IndiaFirst Life Insurance is the youngest life insurance company in India with a rich legacy of over 360 years of combined service of its promoters - Bank of Baroda, Andhra Bank and Legal & General.

This joint venture brings together a real understanding of the Indian consumers by the promoter banks with international best practices developed by Legal & General. Shri. Pranab Mukherjee, Honorable Finance Minister, Government of India launched our nationwide operations in Delhi in March, 2010.

Headquartered in Mumbai, with a capital base of Rs. 455 crore we are one of the most capital efficient life insurance companies in the industry today. Bank of Baroda holds a 44 per cent stake in IndiaFirst, while Andhra Bank and Legal & General hold a 30 per cent and 26 per cent stake respectively.

IndiaFirst have already achieved substantial progress during our first year of operation.

IndiaFirst set up new benchmarks in bancassurance in terms of branch activisation, productivity and customer friendly sales processes.

IndiaFirst aim to place customers First in everything they do and believe they can differentiate themselves through simple, easy to understand products, fair price, high quality service and honest advice.

IndiaFirst have initially focused on the bancassurance model leveraging the existing branch network of over 4,500 branches of our promoter banks across the country. We plan to further strengthen our distribution reach by launching our alternate channel of distribution.

This combination of domain expertise, customer knowledge, product innovation and nationwide reach has helped IndiaFirst cross the 1 lakh policies mark since it commenced operations and establish a customer base spread across more than 1000 cities and towns in India.

IndiaFirst initial product range covers the typical needs of protection (term insurance), savings, education and retirement.
IndiaFirst will follow this with a whole range of wealth accumulation, health, and group insurance plans.

Indiafirst Life insurance provides different & best Plans and Policies such as

1.Smart Saving Plan
2.Young India Plan
3.Life Plan
4.Anytime Plan
5.Simple Life Plan
6.Tax Saving Plan
7.Annuity Plan
8.Secure Save Plan

Website Address: www.indiafirstlife.com/web/insurancestore/home
Contact Person: Hetal Mehta
Contact Number: 9213239395, 9250072636
Email Address: i.sanya@gmail.com

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Secret behind happy married life

Once X asked Y, "What is the secret behind your happy married life?

Y said, "You should share responsibilities with due love and respect to each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."

X asked, "Can you explain?"

Y said, "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's decisions."

Still not convinced, X asked Y "Give me some examples"

Y said, "smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are decided by my wife. I just agree to it"

X asked, "Then what is your role?"

Y said," My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iran, what should happen in the upcoming Budget, Political issues, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire etc etc."

Do you know one thing, my wife NEVER objects to any of these.

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21 Day Rule

Most people who have quit smoking know that those first 21 days are possibly the hardest, BUT if they can just keep focused on their goal of better health and living a smoke-free life, they’ll have broken one of the most difficult additions we know of.

It’s how your brain works and, yes, it’s a rule. In fact it’s such a powerful rule, that I recommend you start using it today. The patterns we repeat consistently (over a 21 day period) become neurological programs that we then run on a daily basis. You are writing programs all the time, you just may be unconscious of this process. Today, I’m giving you the instruction manual to start writing better programs.

Making rules often seems like it will create limitations but you’ll find the opposite is true. What are your rules? We just passed the first 21 day mark of 2011. Are you still focused on your New Year’s Resolutions? If not, revisit them. Do you still value them or do they require some editing or deleting?

Great rewards sometimes require great sacrifice. Here’s a list of some habits to do for 21 days that offer some surprisingly HUGE benefits. Whatever you decide to do for the next 21 days, make sure it feels right for you and if you miss a day, you need to start back at day 1; it’s called the 21 Day RULE for a reason. When you get to day 21, congratulate yourself and move on to the next one.

Drink 8 ounces of water every day for 21 days

Eat breakfast every day for 21 days

Stop snacking within 2 hours of bedtime every day for 21 days

Do spinal warm-up exercises every day for 21 days

Go for a walk, do push-ups, or any exercise you chose every day for 21 days

Eat a salad with dinner every day for 21 days

Repeat a positive statement about yourself every day for 21 days

Do 5-10 minutes of deep breathing exercises every day for 21 days

Visualize your DREAM life for a few minutes every day for 21 days

Meditate for ANY amount of time every day for 21 days

Anything you choose….. every day for 21 days

The funny thing is, 21 days starts to fly past you and you’ll realize that this is easy. Just focus on choosing habits that you really want to commit to.

After all, it’s your life, LOVE it!

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Learn Lessons from Bad Boss

Poor leaders to be sound teachers

Macho, insensitive bosses share certain characteristics. Their behavior is arrogant, quick-tempered and controlling. Their motives are typically selfish and manipulative. They show little concern for others and few signs of understanding why others don’t trust them. Most of all, they are quite unaware of their failings and the impact they have on their subordinates. No only do they see no need to change, they often make their high-handed behavior a source of pride.

That’s why you can trust them to be some of your best teachers about productivity and success.

Before you decide that I’ve lost my mind, I’ll explain.

Most human beings are amazingly consistent in the way they behave. That’s why we can say of some action, “That isn’t like you,” or “It’s so out of character.” Without that consistency, such a remark would be pointless. And amongst the most consistent groups of all are those who spend least time in any kind of introspection: the extreme extroverts, the loud, slap-you-on-the-back hearty types, the arrogant, the pompous, the selfish and the self-centered — the people who, if they become bosses, are most likely to prove to be bad ones.
Powerful lessons from powerful (and hopelessly unaware) people

Bad bosses can become useful teachers precisely because their behavior tends to be so consistently bad. You can be fairly sure of their motives and intentions, which allows you to compare cause (what they did and probably why they did it) with effect (how it turned out).

The pompous boss, convinced of her superiority and the rightness of whatever she does; the lazy boss, sure that status confers the right to live off other people’s efforts; the rigid, controlling boss, firm in his belief that all subordinates are incompetent without his oversight; all of these (and many more) hold to their actions so tenaciously — and are so blind to what they are doing — that they will provide some of the best lessons in what not to do that you will ever be offered.

Here are seven of the lessons you might come across, beginning with productivity:

* See how much effort bad bosses have to use to make things happen their way; effort that would be unnecessary if they behaved better — all that time spent micro-managing and checking; all the ranting and raving to reduce others to obedience; all the lies and stratagems needed to manipulate others instead of asking them openly.
* See how others react to them; how people become adept at sabotaging their efforts and undermining their success. Even when they dare not oppose the boss openly, subordinates will show great ingenuity in finding other ways to frustrate them.
* Look at the effect bad bosses have on trust — how this type of behavior ruins relationships with customers as well as employees. Once discovered, as it always is in the end, cynical manipulation renders future trust impossible too.
* What about the impact on motivation? Consider how you feel if you find yourself going along with the boss’s bad behavior. Do you feel motivated or depressed? Does it make you want to exert yourself or limit your output to no more than is needed to preserve your safety and career prospects?
* Rigidity next. Most macho bosses see changing a poor decision as an unacceptable sign of weakness. How many times have you seen a bad leader produce disaster from what could have been a triumph, simply because he or she refused to admit to — and change — a bad decision?
* Take some time to consider what survival in the lifestyle of a bad boss demands. Is that how you would be willing to live? Are the rewards they get worth what they have to do to get them?
* Most important, observe the way bad bosses are regarded by those above them. Are they genuinely fooling the top dogs about their weaknesses? Or are those executives simply playing the same game — but far better — manipulating middle and junior managers to enhance their own positions, then throwing them to the wolves when they become too much of an embarrassment?

I’m sure you can think of many more situations where a bad boss has taught you a valuable lesson. Observing and learning from others’ mistakes is as important as learning from your own — and a good deal less painful.

Besides, the macho tough guys can never admit to being wrong. They can’t learn from their own mistakes. Since you can, it’s an advantage you can use for all it’s worth.

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Life is Calling - Go on a date with LIFE

1. Dress counts.

We all want to be appreciated for who we are, not what we wear, but unfortunately, what we wear often determines whether or not anyone will take time to know who we are. You wouldn’t dream of showing up for a date in torn sweats and a dirty shirt – but I’ve seen people show up for job interviews in similar outfits! Unless you need specialized clothing – a uniform for work, grungy clothes for helping a friend paint a house, etc. – dressing like you’re on your way to a first date means you’ll always put your best face forward.
2. Listen more, talk less.

On a date, being fascinated with what your partner is saying is the best way to make them feel good about themselves – and about you. Asking questions and really paying attention is a great way to demonstrate that you value the person you’re dating. It’s also a great way to show people you aren’t dating that you value them – and to make sure you’re as well-informed as you need to be.
3. Don’t be too needy.

“Desperation,” says a character in the movie Singles, “is the worst perfume.” Spend a date leering or pawing at your date, or explaining how very, very, very, very lonely you are is a sure way to get the brush-off. Nobody likes a loser, and that’s exactly how you come off – winners date people they’re totally into, not whoever will have them. This is true throughout our lives as well – lots of people have noticed how much easier it is to get a job when you already have one (and it’s said that the best job interview is the one you come to straight from work) than when you’re down to plucking couch-cushion change for macaroni money. Of course, you have needs – everyone does – but you can get a lot farther in life making it clear to everyone that you’re driven by your passions and talents, not your needs.
4. Be decisive.

Partners of both sexes like to see their dates make decisions quickly and effectively – it lifts the burden from them, and it shows a confidence that most find attractive. Unfortunately, we often think it’s nice to offer our date a bunch of choices to pick from, thinking that it shows we respect their wishes, when what it really does is throw them into decision paralysis – and increase their anxiety because they’re suddenly fumbling and looking bad in front of you. In life, as in dating, making decisions quickly and firmly, while respecting other’s input, is a sure sign of leadership. Even bad decisions made boldly often turn out to be better than good decisions made hesitantly.
5. Smile a lot.

People like people who smile. More than that, there’s a lot of evidence that the physical act of smiling actually triggers changes in our brain chemistry that make us happier. On a date, that means less stressed, more confident, and more attractive to our partner. In life, that means the same thing – even when we’re not perfectly comfortable, a big smile conveys to others that we are, and often gives us the boost we need to actually become more comfortable.
6. Have an exit strategy.

Not from life – that’s a little morbid. What I mean is this: when you go on a date, you have an idea of how, at various stages, to end it. There’s the perfect “kiss at the door” evening (or “breakfast in bed” night), there’s the pre-planned “emergency” phone call from a friend at 8pm to give you an excuse to bail on a bad date, there’s the $20 spare cash tucked away in case things turn scary and you need a cab, etc. In life’s undertakings, too, it pays to have a couple of escape plans ready, as well as a clear image of what success will look like. Grinding away at a project that no longer has any purpose isn’t very smart, but we often feel compelled to “finish the job” even when it no longer matters to us. Likewise, turning up for a dead-end job day after day is a ticket to depression, at best. As the cliché goes, “plan for the best but prepare for the worst” – go into big projects with a clear idea of how much you’re willing to sacrifice and how little you’re willing to gain to consider it worthwhile.

I have a half-dozen more tips, but that’s plenty for one post. I’ll be back soon with more ways life could be more like dating, and our selves could be more like the selves we are when we date. In the meantime, how about sharing your tips for dating and how they might apply to the rest of our life (or why they couldn’t)?

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45. Story of Yama (Shiv Puran)

The sage Sanathkumara was Brahma's son, Sanathumara had gone to visit Yama, the god of death. While they were conversing, a shining vimana brought a man to Yama who immediately stood up to honour the guest.

Yama worshipped him and said, I am honoured. I hope you had no problems on the way. The vimana will take you to Brahma's residence in Brahmaloka.

After this guest had left, another shining vimana brought another guest who was also worshipped in similar fashion by Yama.

Sanatkumara was mystified at this. He asked Yama, Who are these two people? I have never heard of Yama worshipping anyone in such glowing terms. These two must be holy men indeed. They must have accumulated a lot of punya. Who are they? Tell me their stories.

Yama obliged.

There was a city named Vaidisha. The king who ruled there was named Dharapal. Nandi was cursed by Parvati that he would have to spend twelve years on earth as a jackal. His crime was that, when Parvati had gone to perform tapasya, Nandi had permitted a false Parvati to enter Shiva's palace.

Nandi was born as a jackal. The jackal went to the confluence of the rivers Vitasta and Vetravati. There it set up a linga and prayed before it, going without food and water.

After the twelve years passed, the jackal died and adopted a shining form. In this form, Nandi returned to Shivaloka.

King Dharapala had seen the jackal fasting and praying. He also witnessed its strange death. The king's wonder knew no bounds. He erected a temple in that wonderful place. He brought several brahmanas to the temple and made them recite the Puranas there.

When Dharapala died, it was decided that he would go to Brahmaloka because of all this punya. This was the first guest who had come before Yama. Such are the wonderful virtues of worshipping Shiva and the Puranas.

What about the second guest? asked Sanatkumara.

The second quest used to be evil. He had never donated anything in his life. But he once heard the Paranas being recited and was completely converted. He arranged many recitals of the Puranas on his own and donated gold to the reciters.

This punya was going to take him to Brahmaloka. Such are the wonderful virtues of hearing and reading the Puranas. Doing this is tantamount to worshipping Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva.

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42. Andhaka Again (Shiv Puran)

Andhaka had been crowned king in Hiranyanetra's kingdom. Prahlada and Andhaka's other cousins went to him and said, You are blind. What are you going to do with a kingdom? Give it to us. Our uncle made a mistake in accepting a blind son from Shiva.

Andhaka was very hurt at these nasty words. He went away to the forest and started to perform tapasya. He prayed to Brahma. For millions of years he stood on one leg, with his arms raised high, and prayed. No one since that day has been able to duplicate Andhaka's wonderful feat of meditation.

He did not eat or drink at all. He chopped off parts of his body and offered it to the sacrificial fire. It came to such a pass that there was no more meat of blood left in his body. It had all been offered to the fire. He was just a skeleton. It was then that Brahma appeared before him and offered a boon.

Prahlada and my other cousins have taken over my kingdom, said Andhaka. Please grant me the boon that I may be able to see. Please also grant me the boon that I may not be killed by gods, demons, or humans, or even by the great Vishnu himself.

Brahma was in a fix. Earlier, many demons had asked for similar boons, but they had generaly not mentioned Vishnu. So that , when the need arose, Vishnu had been able to kill them. But here was an asura who asking for the boon that even Vishnu would not be able to kill him. This would make him virtually immortal.

Everything that you have asked for is possible, replied Brahma. But all beings have to die.

Indicate the circumstances under which you will die and the boons will be granted.

Since I have to die, said Andhaka, Let it be under the following conditions. If I ever wish to marry a beautiful woman who is like a mother unto me, let that be the hour appointed for my death.

This condition was better than nothing at all and Brahma granted Andhaka the boons. Andhaka returned to his kingdom. When Prahala and the other cousins learnt that Andhaka had become so powerful because of the boons, they not only returned to him his kingdom, but theirs as well.

Remember that Andhaka could now see.

The first thing that Andhaka did was to invade heaven. He defeated Indra and the other gods and made they pay taxes to the demons. Next he defeated the snakes (nagas), the gandharvas, the rakshasas, the yakshas (companions of Kubera) and the humans. Thus he began to rule over all the three worlds.

For millions of years Andhaka ruled in this fashion. The religion of the Vedas suffered during this period, since Andhaka paid no attention to it.

Once Andhaka went to a visit tot he Mount Mandara. The place was so beautiful that he made up his mind to live there. Three of Andhaka's generals were named Duryodhana, Vighasa and hasti.

These three were exploring the environment of Mount Mandara when they came upon a cave. An ascetic was meditating inside the cave. He was dressed in the skin of a tiger, wore a garland of skulls, his hair was matted and he wore a crescent moon on his forehead.

There was a beautiful woman near the ascetic. She was more beautiful than any other woman in the three worlds. The three generals concluded that this was the right wife for Andhaka.

When the generals came back to Andhaka and reported on what they had seen, the asura king said, What are you waiting for? Go to the ascestic and ask him for the woman.

Duryodhana, Vighasa and Hasti went back to the ascetic. You are only an ascetic, they said. You don't deserve such a pretty wife. Our master is the lord of everything and he is immensely rich. He is also handsome because of a boon received from Brahma. Give us this woman so that our master Andhaka may marry her.

Ask your master to come and take the woman himself, replied Shiva, for the ascetic, as you have already guessed, was none other than Shiva. And the beautiful woman was Parvati.

As soon as he heard this, Andhaka grasped his sword and came to fight with Shiva. The door to the cave was guarded by Nandi, and Andhaka first had to fight with him.

Nandi easily defeated the asura and also defeated the asura soldiers who had accompanied their king. But Andhaka returned and again a fight raged with Nandi for five hundred years. Brahma, Vishnu, Indra and the other gods also came to help in the fight with the demons.

The general Vighasa was a very strong warrior. He opened his mouth wide and swallowed up all the gods, including Vishnu. So far, Shiva himself had not played any part in the fighting. But hearing what Vighasa had done, he ascended his bull and came out to fight. He killed Vighasa and rescued the gods from the asura's stomach. The asuras had a preceptor named Shukracharya who knew the art of bringing back dead beings to life. So Shukracharya moved around the battlefield, brining back to life any demons that were killed. This was not helping the cause of the gods at all. Shiva's companions (gangas) captured Shukracharya and brought him to Shiva. Shiva promptly swallowed up Shukracharya.

Soon all the demons were taken care of, with the exception of Andhaka. He continued to fight.

Vishnu's mace could do him no harm and he only laughed at Indra's arrows. Some of the arrows did pierce the asura's body. But whenever drops of blood from his body onto the ground, asuras who were exactly like him in appearance were created from this blood.

As a result, the battlefield was soon populated with thousands and thousands of Andhakas.

Shiva created a goddess known as Devi from his own body. Devi was appointed the task of drinking up the blood of the asuras before it could spill onto the ground. Thus aided by Devi, Shiva started to tackle the demons and soon there was only the original Andhaka left. Shiva flung a trident at him.

The trident struck Andhaka on the chest and the asura king fell down dead.

When the war was over, Shukracharya prayed to Shiva and was released from Shiva's stomach.

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