Here are ten ways to make yourself more open to love. And if it doesn’t work, at least you’ll feel better about yourself. And when the next potential lover comes along, you will be ready!
1: Love yourself
Ahh, get your mind out of the gutter - I’m talking about having respect for yourself. While I know I am running the risk of sounding like a grandma, begin by covering yourself up. You may think your crush wants to see your boobs (and I’m sure he does) but that’s not going to bring you love. If you don’t have respect for yourself, you can’t expect anyone else to. Looking truly sexy is a subtle business, and when it works, it really works.
2: Keep it real
Playing hard to get is all very well, but if it’s love you want, you may want to grow up a little. Keeping it real is a much better method to finding a steady and true connection with someone. Leave the games to scrabble sessions and try to engage in some real conversations instead. Don’t worry about the three-day rule, or any rules. Show him you care by calling him if you want to. Don’t over-do it, but don’t muck him around either.
3: Have a life
One of the best things about being in love is always having someone to talk to. If you have a full and interesting life, it makes sense that you will have more intriguing conversations. And let’s face it - the physical aspect of love only takes you so far. If the two of you can pass the hours deep in conversation without even realising it, then you have potential for a real relationship. So get out there and do things.
4: Set goals
Have you ever noticed how people who know where they’re going in life are always far more interesting than those who seem confused and undecided? I’m not saying you should know exactly what the next five years will bring, but having a goal for the coming year, at least, will make it easier for the object of your affections to respect you.
5: Look after your physical wellbeing
Aside from giving you a hot body, getting some exercise releases endorphins, which in turn provides you with a happy radiance that other people will notice. And perhaps more importantly, you will notice it too. The same goes with eating well. Your skin will be better and you will feel more energetic. It’s all good stuff!
6: Look after your mental wellbeing
Ever sat down to dinner with a person who has just had a hard day? They can’t help but release their tensions by moaning and sighing. Instead of putting all your bothers onto others, why not make sure to take some relaxation time for yourself? Some options are to go to a yoga class, read a book or take a walk.
7: Be positive
Similarly, conversing with a negative person is draining. Try to cut gossip out of your life, or at least keep it for that special friend (we all have a gossip friend!). Talking others down doesn’t make you look any better; it just makes you seem insecure. Try to turn your negative thoughts into positive ones and you may feel better about yourself too.
8: Listen
If you want someone to love you, you need to make sure you love them too. So, listen when they speak. Think about what they are saying and respond. Sounds simple, but when we’re trying to impress it’s easy to forget this basic social skill. Relax - whatever you desperately want them to know will come out in time. Instead, take the time to learn about them.
9: Trust your instincts
This goes back to number two - don’t play games! Teach yourself to have the confidence to act upon your notions. If you think it’s going well and you feel like kissing him - kiss him. Confidence is sexy. It’s also time-saving, as you don’t have to waste precious moments wondering about what each other are thinking. Don’t kid yourself, you know what they’re thinking. Or at least there is a good chance you do. Take that chance!
10: Be yourself
I know what you're wondering 'What do you mean be myself? I don’t have the confidence to trust my instincts, I don’t have goals and I have a boring life!' Well, all of the above tips are about being a new, relaxed you. These are not ways to act, but ways to be. And if you want someone to love you, you will need to make sure you are truly being real. That doesn’t mean you should fart or admit your foot fetish on the first date, but don’t giggle like a schoolgirl either. It’s you who’s going to be there when this relationship continues into the years, so keep it real and you will thank yourself for it later.